Childlike. Unconditioned.

We had recently lost a good soul.  Heart attack.  46 years old.  Someone who could be carefree, clever, resourceful, great when he chose to work.  But surrounded by a peer group of people who are driven, focused, had remarkable accomplishments to show.  Yes. They were kind. And good.  And had humility. But did the comparisons gnaw away at one’s soul?  How can one protect oneself if the self nature is to be a free-bird?  How can one watch out for signs of being self absorbed, being one up, if the self nature is to be focused and chase accomplishments, even if it is just for the challenge of it all.  We could fall into either end of the spectrum, move from one end to another   Or be in between hoping that we do not slide down but crawl forward. It is the luck of the draw.   That struggle, to be not a loser, is something that many if not most endure through their lives, at some point or the other 

I may say that it is our story too?  My story too?  

A story that does not get told, when many more exceptional situations get told   We can’t say ah those are statistical outliers when every story is a human story   Carrying a happy mind, sad mind, troubled mind, angry mind.

A logical question is does every story need to be told for that release, the catharsis, for that external validation and empathy?

How do we develop a framework where we find security and contentment while not letting it all out?  Where we have the resilience when chips are down   Have the empathy and kindness when the going is good.  

May be hindsight and years of accumulated random gyan provides a framework to process life for carrying on    

Would like like to start with the unconditioned mind… any similarities to J  Krishnamurti are not accidental :-)   To look at each situation with an unconditioned mind,   Assessing it based on it’s merits, staying comfortable with behaviours and outcomes as long as no one is hurt or put  to disadvantage.   If that is the prism with which life is viewed many situations can be accepted without judgement and prejudice   The recent discussions on sexual identity, and how the gender one is biologically binned into is not the behaved one, gets handled wonderfully when the mind is unconditioned and does not judge.  When labels are not attached (including gender based) to how one is dressed, the tone of the voice, is one soft and non assertive vs assertive,  a person’s traits find acceptance without searching for labels   That makes rhe observer unbiased and approachable   And makes everyone comfortable because the only filter being is anyone being intimidated, harassed, put to discomfort, and subjugated   So if i chose to wear pink or blue does it matter?  If i spent much of my time fitting into a team rather than asserting myself did it become a gender play?.  Fluidity spans contexts and situations well beyond gender  

One can lead a life focused on outcomes.  Or enjoying the journey knowing that outcomes may come ones way based on the merits of the actions and the situational needs   A scientist at the purest level could be focused on the journey and the learning’s   A coder may be playing Sudoku for a living.  An accountant may find the scroll of the spreadsheet throwing out patterns and numbers that are captivating   An employee may find the managers approach to getting things done amusing   A journey that is enjoyed like that of a child in a toy train could be a reward in itself.  Adding up to the same adrenaline rush as  someone who gets promoted every two to three years  

So do we strive for one model or the other   The achiever vs the journeyman?  I think it lies in understanding ones self nature.  In each others self nature.  And recognize that being true to one self is the way to find harmony.  We need all of them.  The males, females, and all of them, passengers, the drivers, the seekers, to make the world rock  

Just that let’s not bin them   Ideally, each of us should react to a situation based on its merits, without worrying about lenses and labels and identity, because those are baggage.  One day the achiever may lament for the sights not seen..: or the journeyman may say, could i have had a small pinch of strategy.  

Yours unconditionally  may be older and sometimes childlike   

Oh idyllic land

 In an hour or so we were out of the clutter of JFK driven through I80 and little towns that spend much of their winters draped in snow.  Scranton?  Binghamton?  Lengendary towns for someone who waited for that one snow fall in Raleigh NC.   The rest stop had a genial cashier who loved it when I went for a second round of junk food; I welcomed myself to USA. We were soon in Cornell.  There were hugs and tears with our daughter.   Who had milestone events just ahead.  A thesis defense, some interviews, graduation events et al.

Cornell University is situated in Ithaca a boutique town.  Fast food chains and Ithaca had an exclusion pact.  Little cubby holes ready to slap a five star bill to Indian wallets. But the friendliness of the staff, and the little treats that were in store, the cheesecakes and the wraps, left us with smiles.  Cornell is perched on top of a hill.  The slopes are wooded to the hilt.  There are little streams that radiate out through the green wooded gorges to the Finger lake below.  And cross crossing the stream are roads that meander through with old quaint houses with little parking lots.   The houses themselves have rooms partitioned into small rooms, kitchen counters and toilets.  A house that could typically house four had a dozen students emanate from little rooms, walk to the university and come back home for the night.  Each home probably made $100k a year from student rents.  Surely. Aesthetics and zoning kept large apartment complexes at bay preserving that boutique town feel.  The rentals are clearly 6x higher than the 1990s while the pay check 50% more at best.  But yes, in the evening a walk through the gorges and woods can in still a sense of peace that’s hard to beat.

I typically rise early..  the black coffee is something i savour for half an hour while reading the newspapers.  The Indian newspapers typically have a loud screamer from the war in Middle East   And another from Ukraine   Did they bomb a nuclear reactor?  Along with that we have news on NEET leaks, CBSE scams, Mamta’s antics, Vijay’s jacket   Except for the New York Times which has a similar pecking order of news from global wars and local scams, the rest of the media including evening news, 24x7 news channels seem to live in a new Orwellian world of no speak… the war is item number 7 with no visuals for 30 seconds in a banter toned voice before news on the weather or sports or some entertainer pipes in.  And so Ithaca and other small towns live in that idyllic cocoon, shielded from upsetting stuff from their own media.  

And so with all the smiles and cheers did the other look n feel change?  Except for checking into one hotel i did not have fish out my passport   I innocently asked are we expected to take our passports in manhattan in case we get asked.   Oh no please don’t do that said the lady at the reception   Please please keep them in the safe in your rooms.  Times Square as diverse as ever   The temple in Queens took us past burroughs and one could see that streets were completely ceded to those who came from the far east who made no effort to assimilate   There are others from other parts of the world who have done the same   Devon Street Chicago?  Xxx Detroit?  The last 18 months has not changed everything on the ground   I am thankful but also wished that some induction melting actually took place.

But coming back to the core business of running a world that is prosperous and at peace, it is time to strum the guitar and sing to the lyrics of the answer is blowing in the wind   And as more lay down for a cause they had nothing to do with, the guitars shall gently weep.  That’s what i can do.  It is also time to applaud those societies where they wages and prices are better matched.  I have not clapped so far