We had recently lost a good soul. Heart attack. 46 years old. Someone who could be carefree, clever, resourceful, great when he chose to work. But surrounded by a peer group of people who are driven, focused, had remarkable accomplishments to show. Yes. They were kind. And good. And had humility. But did the comparisons gnaw away at one’s soul? How can one protect oneself if the self nature is to be a free-bird? How can one watch out for signs of being self absorbed, being one up, if the self nature is to be focused and chase accomplishments, even if it is just for the challenge of it all. We could fall into either end of the spectrum, move from one end to another Or be in between hoping that we do not slide down but crawl forward. It is the luck of the draw. That struggle, to be not a loser, is something that many if not most endure through their lives, at some point or the other
I may say that it is our story too? My story too?
A story that does not get told, when many more exceptional situations get told We can’t say ah those are statistical outliers when every story is a human story Carrying a happy mind, sad mind, troubled mind, angry mind.
A logical question is does every story need to be told for that release, the catharsis, for that external validation and empathy?
How do we develop a framework where we find security and contentment while not letting it all out? Where we have the resilience when chips are down Have the empathy and kindness when the going is good.
May be hindsight and years of accumulated random gyan provides a framework to process life for carrying on
Would like like to start with the unconditioned mind… any similarities to J Krishnamurti are not accidental :-) To look at each situation with an unconditioned mind, Assessing it based on it’s merits, staying comfortable with behaviours and outcomes as long as no one is hurt or put to disadvantage. If that is the prism with which is life is viewed many situations can be accepted without judgement and prejudice The recent discussions on sexual identity, and how the gender one is biologically binned into is not the behaved one, gets handled wonderfully when the mind is unconditioned and does not judge. When labels are not attached (including gender based) to how one is dressed, the tone of the voice, is one soft and non assertive vs assertive, a person’s traits find acceptance without searching for labels That makes rhe observer unbiased and approachable And makes everyone comfortable because the only filter being is anyone being intimidated, harassed, put to discomfort, and subjugated So if i chose to wear pink or blue does it matter? If i spent much of my time fitting into a team rather than asserting myself did it become a gender play?. Fluidity spans contexts and situations well beyond gender
One can lead a life focused on outcomes. Or enjoying the journey knowing that outcomes may come ones way based on the merits of the actions and the situational needs A scientist at the purest level could be focused on the journey and the learning’s A coder may be playing Sudoku for a living. An accountant may find the scroll of the spreadsheet throwing out patterns and numbers that are captivating An employee may find the managers approach to getting things done amusing A journey that is enjoyed like that of a child in a toy train could be a reward in itself Adding up to the same adrenaline rush as someone who gets promoted every two to three years
So do we strive for one model or the other The achiever vs the journeyman? I think it lies in understanding ones self nature. In each others self nature. And recognize that being true to one self is the way to find harmony We need all of them. The males, females, and all of them, passengers, the drivers, the seekers, to make the world rock
Just that let’s not bin them Ideally, each of us should react to a situation based on its merits, without worrying about lenses and labels and identity, because those are baggage. One day the achiever may lament for the sights not seen..: or the journeyman may say, could i have had a small pinch of strategy.
Yours unconditionally may be older and sometimes childlike
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